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Tuesday, October 14, 2008

What Bad Mutha Fudruckers do (pt. 1)

I'm not sure how, but the BF has acquired 2 wheelchairs. I'm pretty sure he hasn't been mugging cripples, but I'm not asking any questions. All I know is, on warm afternoons after we've had a couple of beers while we wait for the coals to get hot, we bust out the wheelchairs.

Sometimes (ok, one time) we attempted to have a chariot race with Ernie supplying the horsepower; unfortunately Ernie was more interested in licking faces than pulling wheelchairs, so I ended up running in front of the wheelchair getting Ernie to chase me while Steve sat and enjoyed the wind whipping through his hair at 0.5 mph.

I think the kids playing basketball down the street enjoyed the show.

Most of the time, however, we just sit around and take turns trying to do wheelies on the "good" wheelchair. So there is a lot of this:


And this:

And finally this...



I would help you up, but first let me snap a few pictures.


...which is why we only play Wheelchair Wheelies on the grass.

9 comments:

Ben said...

Don't feel bad about the string of terrible cripple assaults and wheelchair robberies.

I once stole a woman's seeing eye dog.

Dingo said...

Did Ernie steal BF's underwear? Those shorts ride up a few more inches and this entry is NSFW! Woohoo! Show us the weenie!

Nilsa S. said...

Ummm, that's effin hilarious. And instead of telling us about some asshat in the parking lot, why not make up some story about the out of control wheelchair instead. It'd make for good humor! =)

saratogajean said...

ben - I want a seeing eye dog! Can you snag me one? It can't hurt to have two sets of eyes looking for oncoming traffic.

dingo - I'm pretty sure the BF would veto any weenie pics. Wait; I'm pretty sure I would veto any weenie pics.

Unless I see some money.

nilsa - I have become what I hate...a boring story teller! I meant to say that an elephant mistook my car for a kickball.

Homerun!

Kate said...

When I broke my leg and had to use a wheelchair, I reveled in cruising down hills, knowing that I would crash at the bottom. Seriously. And I wonder how I broke my leg in the first place. I'm a dumbass.

saratogajean said...

kate - Not a dumbass, a DAREDEVIL! Just don't crash into my car, ok? She's beat up enough.

So@24 said...

Those are the forearms of a bad mutha fudrucker.

CC said...

This post was too funny! I am glad I found your blog and will begin to read and catch up on things. I need a blog like yours to read...keep me laughiung just have to watch the wine doesn't come out my nose.

saratogajean said...

so - I'm assuming you are referring to Steve's forearms, since mine resemble wet noodles (in both strength and appearance).

cc - Welcome! I get funnier the more wine you drink, but you have to actually drink it, not just snort it out of your nose.

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