My own adventure

Indiana Jones. Need I say more? I want to see this movie so badly that I'm prepared to brave the Local Multiplex on a Friday Night to see it, armed only with a purse full of Jack Daniels airplane bottles and a bucket of Cherry Coke. I'm not above doling out Karate Chops To The Kidneys to the middle schoolers making out in front of me in the concession stand line, either. I refrained at Busch Gardens, kids, but you only get one freebie.

And no, I will not be the ass hole holding up the line by asking the poor, harried concession stand worker to butter the bottom half of my popcorn as well as the top. We all know nobody eats a whole bag of movie-theater popcorn. And if you are the type who brings their half-empty bag home with them after the movie...sad. Just sad. It will never taste as good as it did staring at a 2 story tall screen.

Shia, Harrison, you better have your game faces on. I'll see you at 9:15.